Why Your Emotional Low Point is Just a Form of Grief

Have you ever hit a low point in life—maybe a job loss, a relationship breakdown, or just a general sense of being adrift—and found yourself thinking, "This is awful, but other people have it worse"? We often downplay our personal struggles, telling ourselves that unless someone has died, our pain isn't 'real' grief.

But here’s a simple truth that can change everything: grief is simply about loss.

It's the natural process of reacting to anything that's been taken away from you, whether it’s a person, a role, a long-held dream, or a sense of security. When you finally accept this, you give yourself permission to feel, and that’s when the healing really begins.

The Shock of the Basement Floor

In The Rock Bottom Paradox, (Available Here: https://amzn.to/3R1wTMF ) we share the story of Bill, a successful man whose life looked perfect on paper until his wife suddenly announced she wanted a divorce. For him, it wasn’t a slow slide; it was one of those awful, unexpected moments where "the ground drops away and you thud down into the basement of your life."

Bill immediately felt immense sadness and despair, yet he struggled to call it grief. He thought grief was reserved for death. It was a mindset barrier that kept him beating himself up over his emotions, especially the crying.

Sound familiar? When you’re caught in a deep emotional or financial low, it’s easy to judge your own reactions. But if you’ve lost a relationship, a career, robust health, or the future you thought you’d have, you are experiencing a significant loss, and that is absolutely worth grieving.

By denying the truth of your loss, you keep yourself stuck. You can't start the climb until you acknowledge the hole you're in.

Understanding the Winding Road of Healing

Once Bill allowed himself to recognise his emotional turmoil as grief, he was able to stop fighting himself and start healing.

It’s important to know that healing isn’t a straight line. It's a messy process with ups and downs, much like scaling a whole range of mountains, not just a single peak. Sometimes you’ll even feel like you’re repeating a phase. That's okay—it’s normal.

Therapists often talk about stages of grief, like denial, anger, and bargaining. You don't have to experience all of them, and you certainly won't go through them in a neat order. The goal isn't to get them 'done,' but to simply allow yourself to feel them.

The crucial, final step in this messy process is acceptance. This isn't about being happy with what happened, or pretending everything is fine now. It's simply accepting that what is over is over, and "this, the present, is your new normal." Only from this place of acceptance can you start laying the foundation for tomorrow.

It's a huge mindset shift. It moves you from being a victim of the past to being in charge of your future.

Taking Action: Your Healing Toolkit

Moving towards acceptance requires gentle, deliberate action. The first step on any journey is always the most important, but it doesn't need to be huge. It simply needs to be intentional.

1. Name Your Loss and Give Yourself Permission to Grieve

Stop saying, "It's not that bad." Recognise the thing you’ve lost—be it a relationship, a job, or a long-held financial plan—and acknowledge the pain it has caused. Tell yourself: "I am experiencing a loss, and it is normal for me to feel this way." This permission is the beginning of letting go and starting your healing journey.

2. Seek a Supportive Ear

Rock bottom can feel incredibly isolating. You don't have to go through the healing process alone. Reach out to friends, family, or a professional like a therapist or counsellor. Sometimes, having someone simply sit and listen while you "pour it all out" is intensely powerful and brings immense relief.

3. Focus on the Present, Not the Past

Denial, anger, and bargaining are all ways the brain tries to keep you tied to the way things were. Gently pivot your attention away from 'what was' to 'what is.' Accepting the present moment, even if it's uncomfortable, is the solid ground you need to stand on before you can decide on the next steps for your future.

4. Find Comfort in the Process

Understand that healing takes time and involves doing the emotional work—you have to "feel the feelings" to move through the stages. Find a comfort phrase that helps you stay steady: "It's going to be okay," or "Trust the process." Knowing that you have a path, messy as it is, can give you the confidence to move forward.

The Strength in Acceptance

The tools and strategies in this book—from mindfulness to goal-setting—are all part of a blueprint for climbing out of a low point. But every single tool is built on one core foundation: accepting your current reality.

It’s often from the lowest point that we find the unexpected strength and clarity we need to build a life far better than the one we had planned.

If you're at a point of major loss or change right now, I encourage you to take that critical first step today: simply acknowledging that your pain is valid, accepting your 'new normal,' and beginning the process of healing.

If you’d like more insights and a clear, practical blueprint for transforming adversity into a life of purpose and prosperity, check out my work on the extraordinarymillionaire.com website.

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